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ATTENTION people of Liverpool. Reports of sightings of ‘undead’ creatures around the city have made a dramatic rise. Locals are reporting different types of creatures, ranging from the groaning and shuffling variety to the aggressive and agile.
With with speculation of a possible zombie takeover, residents are advised to be vigilant and to fortify and prepare their homes against any encroaching hordes during the Halloween period.
Please pay careful attention to our guide below for staying safe this Halloween:
Purple Revolver’s Zombie Survival Guide
#1 Bar their entry – Zombies have an unnerving amount of supernatural strength – so protecting your windows and doors is obvious, but vital. We recommend reinforcing with triple locks, wooden planks or better yet, metal bars. Rookie Error: Don’t forget the catflap, petlovers.
#2 Secure your perimeter – Installing tripwires, high fences or digging trenches in your garden is always a good call. Although strong, one thing Zombies are not, is smart.
Trip hazards will buy you more time as the walking dead approach.
TOP TIP: Trapping a zombie in a trench gives you the perfect vantage point for a swift bop to the head using your weapon of choice.
TOP TIP 2: Attach a sound-maker such as a cowbell to the end your trip wire – Voila! You have yourself a zombie alarm.
#3 Be prepared – should anyone be unlucky enough to suffer a deadly Zombie bite, have a First Aid kit at the ready, as well as tinned food, and water supplies – you may be in there for the long haul.
# 4 Avoid unneccessary attention – The undead have a keen sense of smell and will easily sniff out living bodies, but try to keep them away as long as possible by avoiding cooking hot food. Keep your lights off and fit black-out blinds to all windows.
#5 Move upstairs – destroying your staircase is a drastic but often neccessary measure. Decomposing limbs tend to hinder zombies ability to climb, this is sure to stump them.
# 6 Self defence – Make sure you’re ready for the worst, keep a weapon within reach at all times. We recommend either a trusty frying pan or better yet, recycle the wooden planks from your dismantled staircase.
#7 Plan your escape – Never make the mistake of overlooking your escape route. This a vital component in a post-apocalyptic situation, especially if you’ve done away with your staircase. Rope ladders can quickly be slung out of windows for a quick escape in the unlikely event that a zombie beats you to it.
#8 Learn from the experts – Make sure to study up on the best tips and methods for surviving an undead army attack – host a zombie movie marathon night and take notes. Take a look at Purple Revolver’s Fright Night Flicks
FOR FURTHER INFORMATION ON THE ALLEGED ZOMBIE SIGHTINGS IN MERSEYSIDE CLICK HERE: https://www.facebook.com/events/906750856070313/
You can read more of Minnie’s blog posts at www.minnieminnow.blogspot.co.uk